Reframing our Stories: The Podcast

Episode 59: The Stories of Justice and Inclusivity: Darren Calhoun

There are many subjects that Kara and Darren discuss in this podcast, they definitely go where the conversation wants to flow, including the bidet. Somehow, the story of the bidet leads us into the topic of lacking. What does it mean to lack in something and what do we lose when we turn away from ourselves? Darren and Kara also talk about: race, HIV, embodiment and affirming spaces in ministry, and his band - The Many.

Darren Calhoun is a justice advocate, worship leader, and photographer based out of Chicago. He works to bridge connections between people of differing perspectives through story and relationship. Intersectionality is his primary lens when facilitating dialogue and education about justice and inclusion for people marginalized based on race, gender, and/or sexuality.

Darren Calhoun is currently the Worship Leader at Urban Village Church – South Loop and previously served as a volunteer worship leader at Willow Chicago for close to a decade.  Darren is an Associate Fellow with Evangelicals for Social Action and sings with a band called The Many. He co-lead the #ImSorry and #MakeLoveLouder campaigns at Chicago’s LGBTQ Pride parades.  He’s been a speaker and performer at notable events like the Gay Christian Network conference, The Wild Goose Festival, and Sojourner’s Summit for Change. He serves on the board of directors for the Center for Inclusivity, The Reformation Project, and Q Christian Fellowship.

He brings with him an intentional focus on the church being inclusive of a diversity of people and expressions as an authentic reflection of the Love of God. Lastly, Darren is an extrovert who loves hugs.

Follow him on social media at @heyDarren or through his blog, DarrenCalhoun.com.

Episode 58: A Comprehensive Look at Orientation: Aubri Lancaster

In all her education in sexual health, Kara has never heard orientation explained or broken down the way that Aubri Lancaster did when talking about asexuality and aromanticism. Aubri challenged Kara to think more deeply about how orientation is taught and expressed to illustrate that we are leaving out important details and many layers. They look at those layers with more intention. If you like philosophy and the study of human sexuality, then this episode is for you. 

Aubri Lancaster (she/her) is an AASECT and ANTE UP! Certified Sexuality Educator. As a Greyromantic Asexual, Aubri has lived experience and a connection to the Asexual and Aromantic communities that provides a unique perspective on the issues facing the changing landscape of sexuality and orientation. When not working, Aubri spends her time with her spouse, her friends, her 6 year old, and her two adorable Chihuahuas.

Learn more about Aubri:
www.MyPassionAngel.com
IG and TikTok: @AceSexEducation

Episode 57: Enjoying my Own Company with Sobriety: Anthony Eder

Recognizing that sobriety is the step you need to take to get back to you is one that takes courage. Kara talks with her friend Anthony Eder about his journey living into sobriety. On the path to becoming sober, Anthony learned how to enjoy his own company with the connection to others who are also queer and choose sobriety. It’s in this space where Anthony learns how to love himself and find joy while also understanding boundaries and maintaining them. Kara and Anthony cover a lot of ground in this episode from topics around neurodiversity, healthy relationships, negative self talk, politics, and more. 

Anthony is someone who is not afraid to share the struggles he has gone through in hopes that it supports another. After spending several years in Southern California working at a youth camp full time, Anthony is back in the Midwest. He is living life with intention, hope, and curiosity. He is passionate about mental health care, advocating for our voice & purpose, and creating a dance party anywhere we go. He believes sobriety is a path of self love and self discovery. Anthony is a Certified Peer Support Specialist for folks in recovery and struggling with their mental health. He will also soon be certified as an Enneagram Practitioner with The Art of Growth. 

Anthony finds joy in knitting, music, laughing, road trips, and connecting with people on a deep level. He is always searching for new music, so send him ALL your suggestions!
Website: www.theluckiestclub.com
Instagram: instagram.com/mwendo.sou

Podcast Notes: The song we referred to in this podcast was Drawn to the Rhythm by Sarah McLachlan

Episode 56: Rewriting our Story with Dignity: Shereese Floyd

In this episode, Kara talks with Shereese Floyd about how past trauma can leave us stuck in a character and not know who we are. Shereese escaped from an abusive relationship and changed her story, and is now helping others to do the same. Part of being human is learning from the stories of others, listening and seeing the dignity each person holds through stories - even when they hold differences to ours.

Shereese is a storytelling strategist and healing advocate who helps women remember what they are capable of by reminding them of what they have already done. Shereese also works with abuse survivors by helping them reclaim their voices so that they are impossible to ignore. 

She’s the owner of Witness My Life and author of Become the Greatest Story Ever Told: Making a Memoir, a storytelling journal that provides a simple DIY-style memoir process to help readers get their story out of their heads and into the world where it can make a difference. As a former prisoner’s wife and survivor of narcissistic abuse. Shereese uses her hard-fought lessons to help others be seen and heard through journeying through their life experiences — all while turning the worst days into the best days of their lives. 

Shereese is an advocate for social change and believes story is the one thing that truly brings the world together. As a TEDx speaker and coach, she helps aspiring speakers craft signature messages that impact the world. Her TEDx: The Secret to Healing the World was awarded a Cicero Speechwriting Award. 

Shereese is a contributor to CEO World and Entrepreneur Magazine. Her work has been featured or quoted in Blavity, YFS Magazine, Forbes, The Huffington Post, Inside Business, CoVABIZ, and Coastal Virginia Magazine.

Learn more about Shereese:
www.witnessmylife.org

Episode 55: The Importance of Boundaries: Hailey Magee

If you’re a people pleaser trying to establish boundaries, this podcast is for you! Kara and Hailey Magee are self identified, recovering people pleasers. In this episode, they talk about the many layers behind establishing boundaries and the feelings that come with it. Listen in as Hailey and Kara vibe off each other’s insights and make new discoveries of their own. Boundaries are important in creating and supporting healthy relationships and the most important boundaries are the ones you have with yourself. It is in the process of discovering our self-worth that we help ourselves identify and set these boundaries. 

Hailey is a certified coach, educator, and writer who helps individuals worldwide set empowered boundaries and break the people-pleasing pattern. Certified by Erickson Coaching International, she has worked one-on-one with over 200 clients and her virtual workshops have welcomed thousands of participants from the United States, South Africa, France, Yemen, and beyond. Hailey has written for Newsweek, The Gottman Institute Blog and Medium’s Better Humans, and has facilitated group coaching sessions in partnership with WeWork, Amazon, Women In Music, and a variety of other companies and organizations. She received her BA from Brandeis University in Massachusetts and currently resides in Seattle, WA. 

Learn more about Hailey:
www.haileymagee.com
www.instagram.com/haileypaigemagee

Episode 54: Raising Kids Beyond the Binary: Jamie Bruesehoff

As parents, we want the best for our children and want to see them thrive. Our hope is to provide them with protection, care, and a world where they don’t feel threatened. In this episode, Jamie explains what it is like to parent a child who is trans. We all want the same thing for our children, let’s make it easy for us to provide that for all children and families. 

Kara and Jamie spend time talking about the boxes we create for ourselves that don’t allow us to live into our authenticity and how when we allow one another to live into their own authenticity, it is better for everyone. 

Jamie Bruesehoff (she/they) is a nationally known speaker, award-winning LGBTQ+ advocate, and a heartfelt writer. Rooted in her queer identity, her experiences raising a transgender child, and two decades of experience working with youth in and outside of the church, Jamie equips leaders to create safer, more inclusive spaces for LGBTQIA people of all ages. Her family and their work have been featured by media outlets and organizations around the world, including Disney, NPR, Good Morning America, USA Today, Forbes, Marvel, People, Parents, and the Human Rights Campaign. Jamie holds an M.A. in Religion from the Lutheran Theological Seminary at Gettysburg. She lives in New Jersey with her spouse and children.

Jamie's upcoming book, Raising Kids Beyond the Binary: Celebrating God’s Transgender and Gender-Diverse Children, is available for pre-order wherever books are sold.

Learn more about Jamie: 

jamiebruesehoff.com
instagram.com/jamiebruesehoff
facebook.com/jamiebruesehoff
twitter.com/jamiebruesehoff

Episode 53: Tech and Relationships: Kate Ott

Technology continues to be a tool we use to enhance our life and relationships. As parents, there is definitely a love/hate relationship that develops with tech as it can do wonderful things and yet cause harm. In this episode, Kara talks with Kate Ott on how to look at tech in an ethical way and its relationship to sex. 

Dr. Kate Ott is a feminist, Christian social ethicist addressing the formation of moral communities with specializations in technology, sexuality, youth and young adults, pedagogy, and professional ethics. She is the Jerre L. and Mary Joy Stead Professor of Christian Social Ethics at Garrett-Evangelical Theological Seminary in Evanston, Il, where she serves as the Director of the Stead Center on Ethics and Values. 

She is the author of Sex + Faith: Talking with Your Child from Birth to Adolescence and her new book, Sex, Tech, and Faith: Christian Ethics in a Digital Age. In her new book she gets to the heart of the matter of how we humans interact in an artificial space as sexual beings. What are the consequences of this, and where are the tangible positives? 

Learn more about Kate at: www.kateott.org

Episode 52: Finding Freedom in Kink: Sean Orpen

The world of kink is big and often gets a bad rap, especially among religious communities. However, there is a lot more to kink that can help us open our world to a deeper understanding of ourselves. It’s within kink where we are often given permission to explore the depths of ourselves and to be fully present in intimate experiences. Sean Orpen is an AASECT certified sex therapist who co-owns his own sex therapy collective in Seattle, WA and works primarily with those who identify as kinky. In this episode, Kara and Sean explore the way kink can lead to embodiment and open new pathways to ourselves. 

Sean Orpen is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), a Marriage and Family Therapist Supervisor (LMFT-S), an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist Supervisor (CST-S) in Seattle, WA. He finds meaning in helping people navigate their way to pleasure, find their voice, share their values, and communicate desire with others through a sense of empowerment. Bodies are meant to be enjoyed and pleasure sought out. He finds meaning in seeing others becoming powerful in their lives! 

Learn more about Sean at www.pnwsextherapycollective.com

Episode 51: Coming Home to Yourself: Rozella Haydée White

Sometimes it can take a moment, like when you’re having a glass of wine in the evening with a new album playing, and listening to your body to discover the next move to take in your life. That was the case for Rozella H. White. She came to a point where her job was no longer aligning with her core values and knew it was time for a change. Rozella started her own coaching business, RHW Consulting, became the Love Big Coach, and wrote a book – Love Big: The Power of Revolutionary Relationships to Heal the World.

Kara and Rozella talk about what big love looks like and how some of our systems don’t teach us what real love and true intimacy can be. Together they explore the messaging they were given and how learning how to face the hard truth can help us turn our lives around even when there is fear. They cover topics from their roots in church to pornography. 

Rozella Haydée White (she/her/ella) is the #LoveBigCoach, author, and Social Impact Entrepreneur who is focused on nurturing love that is life-giving, justice-seeking, and healing so that all can thrive. She is a public theologian, spiritual life and leadership coach, inspirational speaker and writer committed to embodying love that is bold, intentional and generous.

RHW Consulting LLC is a coaching agency focused on supporting women and women-led organizations as they navigate change, transition and conflict utilizing a Love Ethic. RHW Consulting LLC coaches clients seeking personal and professional transformation.

Learn more about Rozella:
www.rozellahwhite.com
www.facebook.com/lovebigcoach
www.instagram.com/lovebigcoach
www.linkedin.com/in/lovebigcoach

Episode 50: A Pastor, Atheist and Sex Educator Connect

Three friends: Kara, Rola, and Kirt spend some time talking about how they have deconstructed the ideas they grew up with around God, the body, and sex. Rola is a Presbyterian pastor from Lebanon who talks about what it was like growing up in a culture that cries when a girl is born, and how she has transformed her view on her body and worth. Kirt shares what it was like growing up in an Evangelical church, then becoming a pastor in that denomination and how he experienced a sense of distrust and was unable to recognize his own needs and wants. 

Rola Al Ashkar is a pastor, yogi, dancer, community organizer, and nature enthusiast from Lebanon. She is an ordained minister in the Presbyterian Church (U.S.A.), a liberal and progressive denomination. Rola is a certified yoga instructor (RYT 200) and the founder and organizer of ἴama yoga, a free yoga community that meets in the courtyard of Westminster Presbyterian Church, in downtown Sacramento, where she also serves as Ministry Assistant.

Rola believes that emotional, physical and spiritual health are tied together. Her hope is to make yoga accessible for everyone, and to offer through this practice healing and wholeness, in body, mind and spirit. Learn more at www.iamayoga.com

Kirt Lewis is passionate about emotional health, sexuality, environmentalism, and advancing economic equality and human rights for historically oppressed, predominantly minority communities. After leaving the church and ministry in 2017, Kirt has been engaged in conversations and passion projects centered on advancing the cause of recovery from religious trauma. Professionally, he works for International Rescue Committee, a secular humanitarian organization on a special project with the City of Sacramento that provides free professional, personal financial coaching to low to moderate income residents. Most importantly, he is learning to love and grow up into his authentic self along with his two beautiful daughters, girlfriend and warm but moderately crazy cat. Learn more at www.kirtelewis.com 

*In this episode Kara uses the word homosexual but understands the proper terminology is gay.